This is something that I feel really passionate about (some might say a bit too passionate - you have been warned). I have hit the age where my friends are in relationships and are getting engaged and married. It is such a joyful time watching your friends meet amazing men of God who cherish them and encourage them to be all that God has for them. With this comes the dread of having to go to weddings on my own as a single person!
Let's stop right there! When should it EVER be a dread to go somewhere just because your relationship status is single!?! It shouldn't and it doesn't need to be.
This summer I ended up with a fair few weddings and as I shared and chatted to people I had a common response of "Oh, going to weddings on your own is really hard. It makes you feel rubbish about being single."
This isn't exactly the most helpful thing to hear. It made me ask lots of unhelpful questions. What if it is awful going to weddings on my own? I don't want to have to feel rubbish about being single. I might never meet someone - does that mean that every wedding I go to will be hard and make me feel rubbish?
I want to be able to celebrate for my beloved girlies, who are entering such an exciting stage of life, not being so bound up in my own insecurities and pity.
And then it hit me - I have a choice in this. I don't need to fit the 'weddings are awful' mould. I can choose to pursue joy, even when I don't feel like it and circumstances may tell me otherwise. I am not prepared to miss out on the joy and delight of a wedding just because I'm not in a relationship.
Hear me on this. It wasn't just a snap of my fingers and voila, weddings suddenly were all amazing and I never felt crap. That's not what I am saying. My point is society and our communities shouldn't be putting that assumption and pressure on us. Yes, a wedding may highlight your singleness more and make you more aware that it is something you wish to have in the future, but it doesn't affect your value and worth.
I chose to pursue joy and enjoy myself. I glammed up and took pleasure in getting ready and making myself look beautiful (something that doesn't come naturally to me). But most of all, I gave it all back to Jesus. Before each wedding, I prayed and invited Jesus to be with me in each and every one. And he was SO faithful. As I fixed my eyes on him, my insecurity in my singleness lost its power and I was free to let my hair down and enjoy the party.
Some amazing stories have come from my wedding season. At one of the weddings, I didn't know anybody apart from the bride but the Lord put people around me both at the service and in the evening who welcomed me and chatted to me. I got to pray with one lady and share God's love for her and then, in the evening, another lady spoke prophetically over me without her even realising. It blew me away what God did in me and through me as I chose to trust him with it.
I still had my moments - at one of the weddings I had to go outside and march up and down the road until I had reset myself with the Lord!
I want to conclude with this - as singles, we can be free to be at a wedding and be content that we are enough as we are and that we have no less worth because of our singleness.
Let's stop right there! When should it EVER be a dread to go somewhere just because your relationship status is single!?! It shouldn't and it doesn't need to be.
This summer I ended up with a fair few weddings and as I shared and chatted to people I had a common response of "Oh, going to weddings on your own is really hard. It makes you feel rubbish about being single."
This isn't exactly the most helpful thing to hear. It made me ask lots of unhelpful questions. What if it is awful going to weddings on my own? I don't want to have to feel rubbish about being single. I might never meet someone - does that mean that every wedding I go to will be hard and make me feel rubbish?
I want to be able to celebrate for my beloved girlies, who are entering such an exciting stage of life, not being so bound up in my own insecurities and pity.
And then it hit me - I have a choice in this. I don't need to fit the 'weddings are awful' mould. I can choose to pursue joy, even when I don't feel like it and circumstances may tell me otherwise. I am not prepared to miss out on the joy and delight of a wedding just because I'm not in a relationship.
Hear me on this. It wasn't just a snap of my fingers and voila, weddings suddenly were all amazing and I never felt crap. That's not what I am saying. My point is society and our communities shouldn't be putting that assumption and pressure on us. Yes, a wedding may highlight your singleness more and make you more aware that it is something you wish to have in the future, but it doesn't affect your value and worth.
I chose to pursue joy and enjoy myself. I glammed up and took pleasure in getting ready and making myself look beautiful (something that doesn't come naturally to me). But most of all, I gave it all back to Jesus. Before each wedding, I prayed and invited Jesus to be with me in each and every one. And he was SO faithful. As I fixed my eyes on him, my insecurity in my singleness lost its power and I was free to let my hair down and enjoy the party.
Some amazing stories have come from my wedding season. At one of the weddings, I didn't know anybody apart from the bride but the Lord put people around me both at the service and in the evening who welcomed me and chatted to me. I got to pray with one lady and share God's love for her and then, in the evening, another lady spoke prophetically over me without her even realising. It blew me away what God did in me and through me as I chose to trust him with it.
I still had my moments - at one of the weddings I had to go outside and march up and down the road until I had reset myself with the Lord!
I want to conclude with this - as singles, we can be free to be at a wedding and be content that we are enough as we are and that we have no less worth because of our singleness.
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